Memory Loss

I'm a little shocked and puzzled when I read some things I've written over the years. Initially, I look back to reminisce -- to laugh at a goofy story I chronicled, to see if I still remember the tune to a sissy song I composed. Then, I'll come across feelings I completely forgot about (repressed?) ever having. I can't decide if the astonishment comes from not remembering having had such strong/peculiar feelings, or if it comes from the painful realization that I was actually that person at one time.

Still, some of it I find amusing: I used the term "bangable" at age 15 to describe a boy even though I was a LONG way off from "banging" anything! Nonetheless, it repulses and intrigues me to think that I would have completely lost those memories, those details about me/my life, had I not stumbled across them years later.
Did I lose those fragments because once I wrote them down I could delete them from my head?

Or,

do we all walk around with no real clue about who we were 10 years ago, 5 years ago, 1 year ago?

Which is worse? Sometimes, I think the past wouldn't haunt me nearly as much if I didn't insist on documenting every second's passing... but, then again, what's the point of life if you don't remember what you've done or who you were? (I'm certainly open to opinions on this)

~~~

Tallulah Bankhead once said, "It's the good girls who keep diaries. The bad girls never have time." If that's true, then I am, and always have been, a sickeningly good girl.